Welcome to the 12 Keys series of blog posts which will, over the next year, explain the 12 Keys of Sanity and give you detailed ideas and activities to help you bring them alive in your life. This post will focus on discovering the traits you need your HP to have for the relationship to work for you. Future posts this month will continue to give you tips on how to build that relationship.

1. Find a quiet place where you won’t be interrupted. Turn off your phone, Internet, and shut the door to the room you are in if at all possible. Sit in a place where you will be most comfortable writing or typing.

2. Make sure you have a notebook and pen or your laptop if you prefer to use the computer. Open it to a new page and title the page ‘Dialogue with HP’ on line one and put the day’s date on line two.

3. Begin by thinking of some questions you would like to ask your Higher Power. Open ended questions for wise counsel rather than fortune telling questions work best with this method of communication. I like to think of this as a way to connect with Higher Wisdom, not a method to get numbers for the Lottery. Some questions could include: How can I communicate most effectively with my using son at this time? or What can I do that would be most helpful to my grieving friend? or what wisdom could you share with me about my situation at work? or How can I best use my talents at this time? or What do You see as my next best step at home/work/with my neighbor, etc.? Jot down your questions for use as you dialogue.

4. Breathe in slowly, either using a breath meditation (as described in Key #1E below) or with a brief prayer of your choice that will help you get into a centered space.

5. Set up your page as you would a script, starting with your name or ‘me’ with a colon on the left side of the page as follows:
Me:
6. Always say hi and ask if your HP is available to talk or willing to answer some questions.

7. Then, put your HP’s name (see Key#1B below for guidance on how to find a HP that works for you), on the next line:
HP:

8. Rather than working hard to think up a response, after you write your greeting, listen to whatever pops into your mind and write it down.

9. Go back to your side of the conversation. Write your question or whatever you want to share and when you are done writing, get back into a listening space, and write what you ‘hear’. (See example of a real dialogue I had with my HP in Key #1H: Spending Time in Dialogue with your Higher Power – part 1 – below.)

10. As you ask and answer, continue to listen for the deepest answer coming your way. Sometimes your connection will feel clear and others, less so. You may ask a question and simply hear silence. That too can be an answer. When that happens, leave a space beside your HP’s name and move to the next question.

11. Other questions may come to mind as you go. This is a conversation. You are working on building a deep, abiding friendship with your HP in this process. Get to know your HP and allow yourself to be known. Sometimes you will be asking questions. Sometimes you will be answering them. Sometimes you will be simply sharing. It is all good.

12. If you feel uncertain as to whether you are communicating with your HP or just a part of your ego, simply ask: ‘Is this my HP or an ego part?’ You will get an honest answer. If an ego part comes in, simply thank them for showing up and let them know you would like to speak with your HP and go back to the dialogue with your HP.

13. When your dialogue is done, always say thank you, even if you haven’t gotten any or many answers and then say good-bye for now. Remember, relationships grow in their own time. This, too, is a process.

If you find yourself facing blocks as you move forward with this and have any questions, send me your questions at bbuncher@beverlybuncher.com or through Contact Us above, and I will try to answer them within the next day or two.

Keep the Doors of Communication Open with Your Higher Power. Remember, as it has been said, ‘If you feel your Higher Power is far from you, it is you who has moved.’ Come back. you are welcome and wanted in this relationship with your HP. Your well-being is of foremost importance!

Next time, let’s talk about Two-Way Prayer and How It Works to Move the Recovery Journey Forward.

See you soon!

Until then,

Have a Loving Day!

Best,

Coach Bev

Beverly A. Buncher, MA, PCC, CTPC

ICF Professional Certified Coach

Recovery – True Purpose – Career – Life

www.beverlybuncher.com
www.12stepfamily.com
786 859 4050

“Imagine a world where every addict has the opportunity and support needed to build a sober lifetime one moment at a time, and every family has the benefit of a coach to help them blaze the trail to sobriety in their home. Imagine a world without relapse.”

Join an ongoing coaching group and practice your Loving Mirror skills. Go to www.beverlybuncher.com/lovingmirror/ to register today!

Join me as I partner with In the Rooms in my new group on In the Rooms (www.intherooms.com). The free group is called Coach Bev – The Recovery Coach. Start a discussion! Add to one that is already started! and on Fridays starting on July 1, we will have live discussions from 9-10:30 AM ET when I will be answering YOUR questions about how recovery coaching can help you!

Author of the forthcoming book Chaos to Sanity: Transform Your Life with the Four Foundations of Family Recovery

If there is a using addict in your life, download my free e-book on how to transform the chaos to sanity at www.theempowermentcoach.net and read my blog at www.12stepfamily.com

If you are an addict or co-addict in recovery and you would like to find your life purpose, call me to set up a complimentary consult! The fun begins when you are fully living YOUR life ON PURPOSE! You can reach me at 786 859 4050 or through email at bbuncher@beverlybuncher.com.