12 Step Family

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When addiction, or any serious trauma, hits a family, things change. Before, the family was close. They played sports together every Sunday,  and had joyful Sunday dinner together each week. Mom and dad hugged and laughed a lot and the kids felt secure and protected. Now, members are increasingly alienated from each other. Sports games [...]

SAVE THE DATE! If you love an addict, and have run out of solutions, you are not alone! All over the world, the lives of families are being turned upside down by the struggles of addicts! As a longterm member of In the Rooms member, a Certified Professional Coach, and the writer of this 12 Step [...]

If you are the family member of an addict, chances are you use some cliches…like the one in the title…and, how about this one, ‘waiting for the other shoe to drop.’ It seems sometimes, that family members find themselves in total wait mode . Whether waiting for a storm or a shoe to drop, these [...]

Today I received a letter from a reader whose third husband, a using addict like the first two, can’t seem to stop using. She tries to leave but can’t. He tries to get well but doesn’t. This reader wrote a long letter about her situation and here’s what I wrote back to her: Dear Sally, [...]

Tired of the same old thoughts and feelings within you running the show? To adopt a new perspective on your addict, on your life, do this: Embrace the love within you Become willing to embrace your new perspective Be willing to work with whatever comes up. Once you claim that new way of looking at [...]

Has an addict ever lied to you? If so, you are not alone. After all, addiction and lying are best friends. It’s almost as if one cannot survive without the other! But, getting indignant about it each time is, basically a waste of energy… Energy is so amazing. We act as if we have an [...]

Being a Loving Mirror is who we are at our core. Deep within, we are calm, understanding, unperturbed by others’ words and behaviors. We ‘get’ it that people grow at their own pace and in their own time and that everyone is on their own journey. Our inner Self knows that when another person is [...]

If you are a family member who has been carrying the burdens of living both your and your addicted loved one’s life, literally guiding their every move, you may find yourself getting tired. Sometimes, it’s just too much to bear. Yet, you are afraid to let go. You’re afraid that if you don’t help, they [...]

Holiday time can be difficult when drinking and drugging intrude in family fun. Moderation is one thing, but out of control drinking can ruin even the most lively party… So, if you know some out of control behavior is bound to come up at your family’s Thanksgiving party, what can you do to keep the [...]